For the grave marker — price several Monument Companies and compare prices. When you find one that’s reasonable, they will permit you to make payments until the complete purchase price is covered. As for the decorations in cemeteries — Usually they have a pamphlet that describes the allowable decorations, and at what seasons of the year they have cleanups. At that point, families may come and collect the things they want to save. The rest are destroyed by cemetery personnel. Some cemeteries have rules about not allowing anything that contains wire or mesh because those things may be picked up by mowers and trimmers and severely injure cemetery personnel. Another thing that is frequently mentioned is glass, for the same reason as the metal. To keep feelings from being hurt, ask before you do any decorating. It saves a lot of hard feelings. The cemeteries have their share of problems along with everyone else.